Why are Men More Likely to Commit Suicide After Divorce?
According to recent studies, men are two and a half times more likely to commit suicide after divorce as compared to women. These studies have put an end to the famous mistaken belief that women suffer more after divorce.
Women have long been termed as emotional beings by their male counterparts. In fact, it is common for men to ridicule and even feel frustrated about the emotional quotient displayed by women. However, truth is, it is this emotional quotient that helps women cope with divorce far more easily than men. Women tend to make friendships on a far deeper emotional level than men do. These friendships help women deal with their feelings during and after the divorce process because women are able to talk to their friends about their concerns and problems.
Men, on the other hand, tend to form friendships wherein they can get to âhang outâ with their friends but not talk about their deep inner feelings. Since men are not able to voice out their bitterness and hurt felt during the divorce, they tend to feel a void in their lives. In fact, it is common for men to seclude themselves from their friends because they do not even know how to have fun with their friends when their minds weigh so heavily with emotional baggage related to divorce.
Men tend to feel more shattered than women after the divorce because in most of the divorce cases involving children, the custody of the children is awarded to the mother. Therefore, all of a sudden, men find themselves to be a mere visitor in their childâs life, which can be a very tough emotion to deal with.
Children tend to act as stress busters during the divorce process because they become a source of love and support after divorce. While custodial mothers are able to reap the rewards of this love and affection and cope with divorce easily, non-custodial fathers tend to feel very lonely because they not only lose their status of being a husband but also of being a father.
It is common for men to blame themselves after the divorce because they feel that divorce could have been averted if they had been more sensitive to their troubled marriage. Truth is, no matter how much a wife complains about problems or concerns in a marriage, husbands mostly never understand the importance of these issues. For that reason, when wives file for a divorce, most husbands are in state of shock. When men are unable to deal with their feelings of guilt, bitterness, loneliness, and anger, suicide seems to be the only alternative.
Survival Strategies for Men to Avoid Suicidal Tendencies
- Communicate
It is extremely important for men to talk about their feelings and concerns to someone that they can trust and depend on. Since many men do not know how to talk about their innermost feelings to their male friends, it might help if you seek help of a female friend or relative. Often, gaining insights to problems from a female perspective can be of huge help during such a tough time.
If you feel that there is no one you can turn to, seek professional help. Professional therapists will not only help you to overcome your fears and problems but will also help you find solutions to these issues and fears. It is important to remember that your inner healing phase will not start unless you let out the bitterness, sadness, or frustration associated with divorce.
- Join a Divorce Support Group
Joining a divorce support group is a good way to understand that you are not the only one in this tough situation. There are some divorce groups that specifically cater to the needs of divorced men. Joining these groups is a good way to find out what tools and strategies others have used to cope with the stress and problems related to divorce.
- Forgive and Move On
Many times we are not able to move on with our lives after a bitter incident because we fail to forgive those who have caused us hurt and pain. However, truth is, the best way to relieve ourselves of our pain is to forgive the person who is the source of the pain. By forgiving and moving on with your life, you close a bitter chapter of your life and accept the outcome as an eventuality.
James Walsh
http://www.articlesbase.com/divorce-articles/why-are-men-more-likely-to-commit-suicide-after-divorce-383186.html
October 4th, 2009 at 2:51 am
Why are men 4 times more likely to commit suicide than women?
After a divorce this goes up to 11 times.
October 4th, 2009 at 7:53 am
Women drive them to it.
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October 4th, 2009 at 7:55 am
Because men keep their feelings bottled up more than women until they explode.
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October 4th, 2009 at 7:57 am
Because they are unlikely to be as close to their family as women, and men are reluctant to share feelings with their friends.
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October 4th, 2009 at 7:59 am
Because women drive men crazy.
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October 4th, 2009 at 8:01 am
Because when a man is divorced he sometimes loses everything he’s worked for and even access to his children too. It is devastating. It’s one of the reasons why marriage doesn’t appeal to me.
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October 4th, 2009 at 8:03 am
Easy. I just read textbook on it.
It’s related to gender norm and expectation that men have to bear.
Also, men are more reluctant on seeking help when feeling wanted to suicide (gender norm), and they might as well suicide without conselling.
References :
core concept of health 10e Textbook
October 4th, 2009 at 8:05 am
Thats an easy one.
Women and men process information very differently. While men value logic and rationality in their thought processes, women prefer to be driven by emotion and irrationality.
This is of course a wild exaggeration, men and women actually function within both of these paradigms to a certain degree. However, predominantly, women will depend on emotion, while men will depend on logic.
While logic is not necessarily unacceptable to emotion. Emotion is rather detrimental to logic. So, as a result, women are driven crazy by their emotions, and men are driven crazy by their women.
And, when it comes to suicide, well, a women can change her emotional state on a whim. However, logic is hard and fast, and often seems to leave no recourse.
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October 4th, 2009 at 8:07 am
i have heard women actually attempt suicide more frequently than men, but men succeed more often because of the lethality of their methods - men use guns more often, women use pill overdoses and are often saved. only 1 in 10 suicide attempts is successful.
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sparknotes online
October 4th, 2009 at 8:09 am
redundantredundancy is correct. Women are 4 times more likely to attempt suicide, using things like pills, which have a lower lethality. However, men tend to be more impulsive and use more lethal means, like handguns and are more likely to be successful.
So, if you have a couple who divorce and both the ex-husband and ex-wife are equally depressed, the wife is more likely to attempt suicide by overdose, which has a higher likelihood of rescue. While the husband is more likely to use a gun.
References :
http://www.nimh.nih.gov/suicideprevention/suicidefaq.cfm
http://www.nimh.nih.gov/publicat/harmsway.cfm#risk
October 4th, 2009 at 8:11 am
Like someone already said, men do DIE from suicide more, however, women are actually more likely to attempt it, but they do it with means that often are not going to kill them, like pills, cutting wrists, etc. men use guns and ropes, and that usually does the job the first time
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